Why Labeling Our Kids Can Be a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
As a children’s author and a parent, I’ve been reflecting on the impact of labels and how they shape our kids’ self-perceptions. It’s incredible how much weight our words carry, and it’s essential to recognize how they can influence our children’s identities.
Take my little girl, for example. She was labeled as “shy” by well-meaning friends and family. Over time, she began to internalize this label, confidently telling others, “I’m shy.” It was a moment of realization for me—this label was limiting her, shaping her behavior in ways we hadn’t anticipated.
Despite our best efforts to counter this negativity, reminding her that she isn’t defined by a single word, it became clear that the more she heard it, the more she believed it. We often reassured her that it’s okay to feel nervous or uncomfortable in new situations but emphasized that these feelings don’t define who she is.
This experience has motivated me to write a new story in the Ella Bella series: The Adventures of Ella Bella: I’m Not Shy. Through Ella’s journey, I hope to convey a powerful message: labels do not define us. Ella will navigate her own adventures, showing that it’s okay to feel a range of emotions without being boxed in by a single label.
I believe it’s crucial for kids to understand that they can embrace their feelings while recognizing that they are multifaceted individuals. It’s about encouraging them to explore their identities and helping them know that feeling nervous in unfamiliar situations is perfectly normal.
As parents, we have the opportunity to shape our children’s narratives. Let’s choose our words wisely and empower them to break free from the limitations of labels. By fostering an environment where they can express themselves without fear of judgment, we can help them grow into confident, resilient individuals.
Here are the positive affirmations that we say together as a family. You can recite these as part of your bedtime routine. The more we speak positivity into our children, the more that will outweigh any negative words.
I am brave.
I am strong.
I am smart.
I am kind.
I can’t wait to share Ella’s new adventures with you all! Let’s continue to encourage our children to embrace who they are and to understand that their feelings are valid but are not confined by a label.
Have you noticed a label carrying weight with your own child? Let me know in the comments below.
Happy reading and exploring!
— Katie Marie
